Thank Heaven for Little Boys

In my pre-kindergarten years, I attended what was then called "nursery school". I was a precocious kid, and clearly remember avoiding a certain group of girls due to reasons of overt girliness.

One of my earliest childhood memories is of a girl coming up to me one day and stating, in a whiny, sing-song voice, "Kimberly says she doesn't like you". Kimberly always had a dress on, and her hair was always neatly brushed and contained by a headband. She was always surrounded by girls who also wore dresses and tried to pick on other girls to make themselves feel better. I don't think I knew the term "henchmen" at that point, but I grasped the concept. I think we were only three or four years old, but if I hadn't witnesses the bitchy cliqueiness of my own daughter's pre-school class, I would have thought this was an invented memory.

So when Nelly Olson's flunkie tried to taunt me with "Kimberly says she doesn't like you", I think my response was a 4-year old's version of "fuck off". I might have thrown dirt at her. I didn't care. My two best friends were Andy and Andy. One Andy was taller than the other one. I hung around them because they were bullshit-free. We played with trucks and tried to go down the slide backwards, but they never teased me for losing a hair ribbon or not having pink socks.

Malena's been with the same group of girls at school for two years, and every day, there's some new drama about "Maya says I'm not her friend", or "Taylor says my pants are stupid", and I was getting really tired of wiping up tears over the bitchiness of three year old girls. Lately, however, she's been hanging around Spencer.

Oh, Spencer.

How I love Spencer.

Spencer was very quiet at the beginning of school. He has a head of curly hair, and looks like a thoughtful child. He and Malena quietly gravitated towards each other, and play together in peace. Two days ago, Malena started to spike a fever at school. The class went out to the playground, and Malena followed along while she waited for me to come and get her. When Spencer wanted to run around, the teacher told him that Malena wasn't feeling well, and she was going to sit at a table and rest until I got there. So Spencer said, "I'll sit with her".

(sniff!)

They have this beautiful kindness towards each other that I absolutely love, and I have so much love for this kid who is so sweet to my baby.

Spencer made me think back to Andy and Andy, and then over to Thomas and Thomas, today's versions of boys I play nicely with. They sit back in amusement while I run in wide, screaming circles. They listen patiently to my daughter's nuttiness. And they send flowers, or a lovely card, or the perfect gift just when you need them the most. It's funny how I keep going back to the kind, smart boys with good manners. I'm so lucky to have them in my life. And Thomas P., "adorkable" is never going to catch on. But I still love you both. :)